I'm referring to Cristiano Ronaldo, the Portuguese striker who plays for Real Madrid, and Grady Sizemore, the slugger-outfielder for the Cleveland Indians. Both of these guys are at the pinnacle of their respective sport, both have smokin' hot bodies, and thus both have women (and men) wetting themselves whenever they appear with their shirts off. Which, in Ronaldo's case, is just about every time he plays a match. So let's start with him.
Cristiano never had abs this hot before, and I suspect he's fallen head over heels in love with himself. He's almost too pretty, in a European sort of way. (I can almost hear Kathy Griffin asking him, "When you look in a mirror naked, do you pleasure yourself?") From the looks of things, they airbrushed his cock outline, but it's still visible on some of the shots.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a huge CR fan. He has put sex back in soccer like no one else before him, including that wimpy-looking guy married to Posh Spice. And in a few months, I'll be glued to my TV set when one of the most riveting matches in history unfolds that first week of the World Cup: Portugal vs. Brazil.
Two Portuguese-speaking countries, the mother country and its offspring, facing off against each other on arguably the biggest stage in sport. And when Portugal pulls off an upset win, I'll be wetting myself along with millions of others as Cristiano shows us those abs in the flesh.
SIZEMORE'S BIG-SIZED WOESAnd now about Mr. Sizemore... Apparently, our hot, sexy outfielder thought he'd be really cute with his Playboy-model of a girlfriend and show her what he could now do with his new cell phone: take sexy, half-naked pictures of himself and email them to her from afar. Trouble is, dumbass, once you hit the send button, you might as well have plastered the photos in Times Square.
Sure enough, the girlfriend shared them with a friend, and that friend shared them with the rest of the world. But who's complaining? For a few years, I've been sort of smitten with his lucious lips and wondered what his chest must look like. Now we know the rest of the story: His nipples are as lucious looking as his lips, and judging from the cock outline, his penis is equally mouth watering.
So enjoy the pics, guys... Let me know what you think...